Dancing With Boys in the Gym

*(This post was originally published on 2/24/14.)

As we close out Bethany’s fourth year of Flash Club for 2018, I thought it might be fun to take a look back at her very first club activity!

special needs dancing

Bethany has just completed her first eight week session of Flash Club, the social and fitness club for kids with autism that she just joined!

I consider the experience to be a phenomenal success despite her persistent efforts to sabotage herself from being able to attend.

It is a mystery to me why she continues to give us such a hard time getting ready to go!

I know I’ve mentioned this before, but at the risk of seeming redundant and annoying, I’m saying it again because this is an issue that weighs heavily on my mind.

It’s so heartbreaking for me when Bethany stubbornly refuses to get ready in a timely manner to go to the very places that she loves to go to.
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Every week when it’s time to get ready for Flash Club she nearly causes herself to miss out on having a great time.

I so desperately want her to have some fun after so many years of experiencing the pain and torture of seizures and brain cancer treatments.

She’s missed out on too much of life already.

She just does not get the concept that she must get ready to go at a certain time so she can get there before it’s all over!

She thinks the world is going to wait for her arrival!!!

When we are fortunate enough to convince Bethany to get herself together and into the car on time, upon arrival to our destination, she cheerfully races inside to find her teacher and friends!

Then she has a blast participating fully in all the activities every step of the way!

It is so very obvious that she thoroughly enjoys every minute of club!

Which is why her her refusal to get ready on time is so distressing!

But, anyway, this week we made it on time and Bethany experienced a new first- Dancing with boys!

They were so adorable gliding across the gym floor together!

Bethany even held hands with her dance partner!

It was the sweetest thing ever!

My husband and I are so very thankful for Flash Club and all those involved with making it a reality for Bethany and the other kids with special needs.

We are also very thankful that God has seen fit to grant Bethany a respite from her chronic illness.

We are thrilled beyond belief that after so many years of having nearly continuous debilitating seizures, Bethany can finally begin to participate in exciting new experiences, make new friends, and enjoy her life a little!

The next session of Flash Club is going to be all about basketball!

I hope Bethany loves this as much as she has the dancing!

Hopefully as the routine of going becomes more and more a part of her regular schedule, she will in turn become more and more cooperative with preparing to leave the house on time.

Do you have a special needs child who is intent on destroying their own chances at having fun?

How have you handled it?

*Update 6/26/18: Bethany has been cooperating with getting ready to go to club for a very long time now! In fact, she hates missing a Flash Club session unless it’s an activity on the workout machines! She does not like working out on machines!! She does however absolutely love, love love basketball and wouldn’t miss a session! She also very much enjoys, Yoga, spinning and stepping, and swimming!!


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Bethany Drumming during the break!
Bethany at Flash Club in 2014

Bethany at Flash Club in 2018

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15 Replies to “Dancing With Boys in the Gym

  1. It must be hard for both of you. Do you think she sees herself as being difficult before she goes? Least she is going, and enjoying herself when she gets there. Aww it must have been SO lovely to see her dancing with those boys. 🙂

  2. Praying for all of you. Bethany is such a precious young woman. And you are doing an amazing job parenting this child of God. He has entrusted you with her life because He knew you are up for the task. He will continue to empower you through the years as you care for Bethany. Thank you for sharing this great moment in your life. Blessings

  3. It may not be sabotage; it may be poor executive functioning. One suggestion I heard from a workshop with Sarah Ward is to take a picture of her all ready and them label it so she can actually see what she needs to look like before walking out the door. According to Sarah ward, one problem is that many kids don’t have a visual image of what “get ready” means.

    Good luck!

  4. So awesome that she’s able to do this!

    One of my boys hates any sort of disruption to what he is doing. So even though he loves to play basketball, he gets upset when I tell him he needs to stop doing whatever it is he’s doing at home and get ready to leave.

  5. My child is not special needs, but he does this, too. He actually does it with everything – school, soccer, basketball, his own birthday party! Maybe you can take this as a sign that she’s doing something that all kids do and rejoice in that. 🙂

  6. Way to go, Bethany (and way to go, Mum and Dad and everyone else involved). It’s awesome that she is able to get involved so much more in life now without seizures interfering… Dancing with the boys – a rite of passage for all young women, all throughout history. Very sweet photos.

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